It hurts,
To see everything
Yet not feel it.
It kills,
To know that I can
Yet be restricted.
The struggle is hard,
Yet so easy.
I want to remain calm,
Yet scream out loud.

Is the world conspiring?
Am I losing out?
But no, I know this for sure
I’m not crazy
My reality is just different:
“The skies are blue
The birds sing sweetly
Friends all around-close and dear
Living the life on my own
Being independent”

It is a warm feeling,
To know you can and be there
To reach out and feel what want to
To wish for and make it happen.
I promise myself this,
I will get there
One day, for sure;
To live the life I dreamt.

The Independence Day

Step outside and look around you today. Do you see little Indian flags all around the place? Do you see decorations in the colours of our national flag? Do you see people talking of the great freedom fighters? Do you see documentaries of India's great fight for freedom? Do you see people celebrating their country's freedom? Do you see politicians honouring the people who led India through her struggle? Do you hear them talking of the great deeds that were done and how we must strive hard to work our way through all trying and tough times? And all this only on August 15? What happens to all these emotions after the stroke of midnight on the August 15? Do they just disappear? Does it suddenly die inside the people?

I am reminded of excerpt from the book "India Past & Present" by Prakash Chander.

Early in 1947, Mahatma Gandhi met Lord Bevin, the personal emissary of British Prime Minister Winston Churchill, in Delhi. Bevin is reported to have told the great man, '18 languages, 500 dialects, some 30 religions, a million Gods and Goddesses, 300 million individuals, an infinity of castes and sub castes and population (that is) practically illiterate and half of which are beggars or thieves...Good luck, sir! Such a nation is ungovernable! It'd take you centuries to get anywhere!'. Gandhiji wrapped his large, white shawl a little more closely around him, and modestly replied, 'India has an eternity before her..'

It may definitely not be an eternity since then but 62 long years have passed. Where does India lie today? What is the attitude of the Indians today? Back in 1947, when India did attain her freedom from tyrannous British Raj, the entire country stood together as one and rejoiced and basked in all its rich diverse glory. If all this was attained under the leadership of one simple and generous man, the Mahatma, who is still revered in our hearts, how is it that still more than half of our population does not abide by the principles set forth by him. Correct me if I am wrong, but isn't it like throwing dirt on the person when we say that we respect and honour him and not follow/at least try to follow his example? Even while reaching out to people using documentaries and movies, are those feeling being practised in everyday life? All this colour and euphoria on this particular day alone is not going to get India to reach heights. The feeling of independence and the love for our country should be felt through every second of every single day. The want for our country to reach the top and to maintain its position there, we must all join hands together. We are still clinging on to the fact that India has developed a lot since her freedom. But is that enough? Aren't we, as the current generation, responsible for its further development? India may have been the fastest developing country since 1947, but she still hasn't joined the list of developed countries. With the current potential of our country's youth, and a change in the attitudes of the general population of Indians all over, India can definitely leave her mark forever.

I end this note hoping that each of us will come together and encourage one another to help in the progress of our country in the international level. Let this emotion that we share on every Independence day be with us through everyday so that the tricolour flag of our nation will fly high forever and ever more...

Reminiscing...

Kathleen had a lot going on in her mind. In a couple of months she would end her teen years. It would finally be a past phase. She thought back to the eve of her 13th birthday. The little child inside of her had fancied it to be something huge. Thirteen. The start of teenage life. The years of great excitement and fun. She had laid awake well past into midnight thinking of all the wonderful things that would happen. In her mind she drew up colourful images of what her life would be. She felt it was an important phase of her life. She imagined of all the new friends, new grades, new places, new attitudes and new changes that would happen. Finally after she fell asleep, she dreamt dreams that were far too pleasant. It was to be the start of the most perfect and important phase of her life. During this new year, she was excited at the slightest of changes that took place. She twittered and fluttered around like a little butterfly. After the initial excitement died away, she came to realise that being a teenager was no fairy-tale like experience. It had its thrills and disappointments. It was just another year in your life where you could learn new things and mould yourself to being a responsible and caring adult. During these years, she learned a lot about trust, love and friendship. Apart from her academics, she was also active in the sports field and other extra curricular activities.

Now, looking back, she realised that every single person that she had come across had taught her a valuable lesson however small it maybe. During these last few months of her teenage, she realised that these years were the years that actually developed the person inside of you. Till the age of 10 or 11, most things we do are because of our inquistive nature and curiosity of the unfamiliar surroundings. By the age of 13, we come around to understanding most things around us. By 17, we "think" we are completely ready to handle life on our own and finally when we turn 19 years old, we realise and understand what those advices we received actually meant. This is when it dawns upon us that we have matured into grown ups. Kathleen felt she was treading her feet along this path now. Although her teen years didn't turn out exactly as she had imagined it to be, she knows she has come a long way from being that wishful little child on the bed of her thirteenth birthday.

And as the "twenties" call out to her, she keeps reflecting on her life so far...